Shaping Life's Clay: Embracing Mistakes and Unexpected Turns

We are all going to make mistakes at some point or another, and when you do, there is no need to be so hard on yourself. There will also be times when things are out of your control, and all you can do is make the most of the situation. How you talk to and feel about yourself is very important. When you are too hard on yourself, you become discouraged, which leads to diminished motivation and productivity. Rather than becoming upset with yourself for whatever happened, you should look at the experience and determine what, if anything, could have been done differently. Then, in the future make that adjustment. But if there was nothing you could have done to change the outcome, then you must try to move on without blaming yourself. 

I sometimes joke that I’m a recovering perfectionist, but there is some truth to that. I want everything to be perfect, whether it’s hanging a picture centered on the wall, making an omelet, or completing something for work. I get so frustrated when something doesn’t turn out the exact way that I wanted it to, and I beat myself up over it. I say bad things about myself, and I sometimes even feel sorry for myself. But as I grow personally and professionally, I have been actively working to be patient and forgiving with myself.

In 2023, my friend and I decided that we wanted to try new things. We both signed up for a pottery class because neither of us had ever tried making pottery. I came into the class thinking that it would come naturally to me and that I would create so many pieces that I could take home. However, as you may have guessed, that’s not how it worked out for me.

Throwing on the wheel was significantly more difficult than I imagined it to be. All of the videos I had seen of others using the wheel made it look so easy. The first piece of pottery I ever made was a very wonky bowl. I was trying to make a mug, but I couldn’t figure out how to manipulate the clay. I still have it sitting on my desk, though, as a reminder that even when something doesn’t work out the way you wanted it to, you can still create something beautiful. Had I given up after that first class, I would not have made all of the other pieces of pottery that I now have. 

I’m not saying that you need to sign up for a pottery class to overcome being hard on yourself, but there are lessons in life everywhere you look. In every experience you have, there is something that can be learned. I sometimes like to think of life like clay. We mold our experiences into different shapes, but sometimes we run into obstacles, causing the clay to go in a different direction. Rather than being mad at the clay or at ourselves, we must continue shaping it, and we might be surprised by the results.

The next time you start feeling upset with yourself when things go wrong, take a step back and breathe. If there is nothing you could have done to change the outcome, then make the most of what you have. And if you could have taken different actions that led to the results you wanted, then now you know what to do next time. Don’t be so hard on yourself, and instead look for the lessons in all that you do.

-Meghan Slaughter